Palms down

I know in my very first post I shared that I attend church basically every week. My husband and I attended church, and volunteered every week for quite a while then at the end of my last pregnancy we had dwindled down to not volunteering, and then not going. We blamed it on being tired or “burnt out”. We had our daughters first birthday and realized we hadn’t been to church except maybe a hand full of times throughout her first year of life. One Saturday morning our five year old woke up and all he would say is, “I want to go to church today!”. He repeated this phrase at least a dozen times over a five hours spread, and my husband and I decided we needed to go. I text my mom and asked her to save us a seat for service. Since then we have gone every weekend except maybe two for sickness. One thing my main pastor always says is be palms down. If your palms are up you are still grasping onto things. If you are palms down then you are relying solely on God. I have had a whirl wind since meeting my husband to present, and there have been many times where I have seen my life going down, at those moments I go palms down. Obviously what I have been doing on my own isn’t working, and I need God to take control. I think the greatest gift God gave me was my mother. 

I have many blessing in my life, a great family, amazing husband, and the most beautiful kids, and truely remarkable inlaws, but my mom is the greatest gift. She raised me despite a multitude of trails and tribulations. She gave me memories of Disney on ice, Rollero, water parks, camping, and so many more. She has always been there for me, sometimes resulting in a lecture I don’t want, but i need. I post a lot about how my house is messy but my kids and I spend time together. My mom was a super woman our house was always spotless and we did things. I to this day can’t understand her compassion and the level of patience she is able to keep, but i am grateful. When I pray, I pray that God makes me a light onto other leading them to him, and I truly believe that’s my mom. I want to share a very common scripture with a twist my pastor taught my husband and I before we married. 

My mom is patient, my mom is kind. My  mom does not any, my mom does not boast. My mom is not proud. My mom is not rude, my mom is not self seeking, my mom is not easily angered, my mom keeps no record of wrongs. 

1 Corinthians 13:4-6 

The verse continues, but replacing the word love with my mom, it is the truth. Thank you mom, for being you, and thank you for making me be me. Right now I am at a moment in life realizing I need to be palms down, because what I am doing , isn’t working. I will be fine, because I have an amazing role model, and a loving God. 

Do you need to be palms down? 

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Palms down

The Blame Game

I want to start this by saying I attend church service every Saturday (I might miss a few here or there, I am not perfect). The church my family attends is a nondenominational Christian church named Christ Church of the Valley ( CCV). This Saturday that just past our service was entitled You Ask? People write questions and our pastors attempt to answer them through scripture. This weeks topic was “why does God allow people to suffer?” One instance used was starving children. There is currently enough food produced in the world for every person to eat 3,000 calories a day. Unfortunately corrupt governments keep their citizens starving. Another instance was miscarriage or still birth or infant death. They played a video of a couple that’s daughter died at 97 days of life from a heart condition she was diagnosed with in utero. The couple showed amazing strength and grace. One thibig the mother said that stood out to me was “she got to heaven sooner, we are all trying to get there anyway”. Her point of view wasn’t as a victim, but as a servant. She realized God gave her an opportunity to help others that have gone through this terrible loss. I am by no means saying get over it. What I am saying is you can blame yourself , blame others, blame doctors, or blame God, but it is nobodies fault. God promises to take whatever pain you are experiencing and draw something good from it. I pray that everyone who has ever experienced this kind of pain find peace with knowing there is always something good that can come out of any bad situation. CCV video mentioned in post. 
Remember no matter what you are going through in life someone is experiencing it also and strength is in numbers. 

The Blame Game